…that if you go to a comedy club and get offended by the jokes, you’re an idiot. The funniest jokes out there are funny partly because of shock value, and partly because they’re true, but mostly because you don’t hear them in a normal every day conversation. It becomes funny because it’s something rare.

..that, having said the above, there’s no need to be hateful with your jokes.

…that auditioning is the worst process ever invented, but until someone invents a better way for a company to sift through hundreds of possibilities in a reasonable amount of time, I will have to continue to hate auditioning.

…that the old adage “If you’re not with us, you’re against us” doesn’t hold true in most situations. 99.9% of us really couldn’t give less of a shit about whatever it is you’re thinking. It’s better to give people the benefit of the doubt (e.g. they really were busy and not avoiding you, they really had a reason to decline your work) rather than assume they’re out to get you. (Hint: they’re not.)

…that when it comes to prejudice and discrimination, shit does not just flow downhill. It goes both ways. Minorities can discriminate against majorities just as well as majorities can discriminate against minorities. Get off your high horse and just be fucking nice.

…that regardless of who you are, what you’re doing, or where you are, you should take walk outside, close your eyes, take a deep breath of air, and enjoy being alive. It only happens once.

Peace.

…that sometimes it’s important to know when to accept that you’ve lost and move on to bigger, better things. It’s better to lose and learn than deny you’ve lost and learn nothing.

…that the new X-men movie was okay, but more disappointing than anything else.

…that Jan Rhodes, the secretary at Jacksonville State University’s Drama Department and one of my dear friends, will be missed greatly by very many people, including myself. I lament that more people won’t be blessed with her guidance and wisdom, but I’m very thankful that I’m able to call her friend.

…that whoever invented string cheese is a genius. Period.

…that anyone who modifies Wikipedia to back up a factually incorrect statement should be whacked across the face with a baseball bat, then kicked in the nether regions with a steel toed boot.

…that it’s really neat to know a casting director.

…that there is always room to improve. “Great job” makes me feel good, but it doesn’t help me improve. If I’m doing exactly what you want me to do, then say that. Otherwise, I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing (or what I think I can do to improve) until I get further direction.

…that “curvy” is not a polite way of saying “fat”. They’re two distinctly different things. Curvy implies attractiveness. Fat does not. Sorry.

…that sometimes what I think of you and what you think of yourself are two completely different things. I detest lettuce. I don’t like assholes. If I don’t like you, it’s not because you like lettuce — it’s because you’re an asshole. Just because I dislike one doesn’t mean I’m automatically judging you based on those criteria.

…that there are few things more comforting than curling up on a couch and reading a good book on a rainy afternoon.

…that my coworkers are really smart. I try to assume that I’m the dumbest person in the room, but (not to brag or anything) it’s not very often that that’s actually the case. I imagine in a 2AMT meetup, I’d be in a similar situation.

…that I’ve got a great job and great friends in an amazing city. I’ve got nothing in my life that sucks. And that’s a good place to be

…that I should take advantage of my good fortune to find ways to pay it forward. And I will.

…that I really, really, really wanna go to the moon. It sounds like fun!

…that it’s sad when a comedian is the voice of reason in society.

…that you can never really know all the facts, so unless there is just overwhelming evidence to the contrary, why don’t we just give the benefit of the doubt to people? Quick example: someone recently told me that one of my projects was fine, but his version was better. I was pretty pissed off for a long time, but then I realized, you know, he has never said anything else mean to me, and I thought to myself, “Self, I bet he didn’t even realize how insulting that was. I bet it never crossed his mind.” We get a long just fine now and have a relatively good working relationship now.

…that people have a very, very hard time putting themselves in another person’s shoes, and it’s very hard for us to think about the ramifications of our actions.

…that we’re all the hero of our own story.

…that we’re all the sidekicks in our friends’ stories.

…that in some stories, we’re the villain.

…that one of my goals in life is to be a better sidekick to my friends, surround myself with the best sidekicks I can find, and be the villain in as few stories as possible.

…that based on my experience thus far, this is so true.

…that while I won’t celebrate the death of bin Ladin, I will celebrate the victory and morale boost that his death represents to America and its allies. I wish there had been other options, but from what I understand, the only outcome of a confrontation with him would have resulted in his death.

…that it sucks when people you care about are sick. There’s nothing you can do about it. You can’t touch them and make them well. You can’t give them a hug to relieve the pain. You can’t do anything. It sucks.

…that the level of talent I’ve surrounded myself with is humbling, both from theatrical and computer-related standpoints. The guys I work with are some of the best programmers I’ve ever met, and they’ve built an incredibly efficient system. It’s flattering to know that they count me as one of them. Likewise on the theatrical side, my friends write the best plays, perform the best shows, and direct the best productions I’ve ever seen.

…that the art that moves it the most is the art that makes me look at something I thought I knew with a brand new perspective.

…that nothing gets you out of a rut faster than moving to a new city. I love San Francisco so far!

…that it’s really nice to work with people who know what they’re talking about, which challenges me to work harder and learn more.

…that it would be better if I wasn’t couch-surfing.

…that you can’t reason someone out of something they didn’t reason themselves into.

…that sometimes you gotta try anyway.

[Note: in the hubbub of starting a new job yesterday, I forgot to write my weekly I Believe post. I'm sure you understand ;)]

…that it should just be “marriage”. I had breakfast this morning — not “straight breakfast”. I made a call to my mother today — not a “straight call”.

…that I’m the dumbest person in my office at my new job. This is a good thing. It means I have plenty of awesome people to learn from. Just the sheer number of ideas and techniques I learned yesterday (on my very first day) blew my mind.

…that moving to San Francisco appears (so far) to have been a great idea.

…that every apartment listing should come with a floor plan. Pictures are good, but they don’t really show enough about the way the apartment is laid out.

…that I could really go for a grilled cheese sandwich.

…that the best advice I’ve ever received was in an improv course: “Say yes.” This works outside of improv as well. Have an opportunity to do something you normally wouldn’t do? Say yes. Thinking about asking that cute girl out? Say yes. Get a job offer to move across the country? Say yes. Want to go back to school to learn new skills? Say yes.

…that the hardest part of the day is getting out of bed. Once that first step is taken, the rest falls into place.

…that the busier I am, the more time I seem to have.

…that we have nothing to fear but fear itself. I can’t tell whether I’m shaking from excitement or nerves, but I’m biting the bullet and jumping in. Worst case scenario, I can look back a year from now and say I gave it a shot.

…that I am finally moving. See you guys on the flip side.

…that rejection should be like a band-aid: it’s better to rip it off quickly than to draw it out over a long, protracted period of time. It might hurt a hell of a lot at first, but it lets you forget it quicker and move on.

…that it’s fascinating that rejection actually causes physical pain.

…that the title of Sucker Punch is incredibly apt on so many levels, my favorite being that it’s actually a brilliant movie. I won’t rehash it here, but check out this two-part review by Teresa Jusino (Part 1, Part 2) over at Tor.com. I suppose one reason that I like this review is that it’s almost line for line what my friends and I discussed as we left the movie theatre (and subsequently ate dinner). The fact that Teresa independently drew the same conclusions reinforces my belief that there was actually intent behind Snyder’s movie for the things that Teresa mentions in her reviews. Bottom line: It’s not just pure eye candy. It’s really full of depth and layers.

…that the phrase “when it rains, it pours” appears to be true. I got good news last week, and all throughout this week I’ve gotten nothing but more good news and had people tell me things that really boost my confidence and self-esteem. I suspect that being happy (and visibly so) encourages others to be more positive toward you. Likewise for appearing negative. Note to self: smile more often.

…that the world would be a better place if we took Tink’s advice to “think happy thoughts” more often. We wouldn’t fly physically, but perhaps our self-esteem and confidence would soar.

…that nobody’s out to get you. We’re all out to protect #1. And if looking out for ourselves hurts someone else, well… depending on who that “someone else” is, we may consider that an acceptable casualty. But nobody [sane] wakes up in the morning and says, “Hmm. How can I screw over the American people today?”

The best part of waking up...